New Years has crept up upon us once again…
For the last eight or so years, New Years has evolved from party mode to transformation mode-
Transformers- more than meets the eye:)(my favorite toys as a child… that and hot wheels:)
Well, I can’t say every year has been so self -reflective- I had one year that I celebrated New Years in Egypt and went from an all night party near the red sea- straight to an all day party in the desert- there was definitely not a lot of self reflection going on that New Years.
I think they could change the saying from walk like an Egyptian to party like an Egyptian…
The road from January 1st is paved with good intentions of change- balance – new beginnings-
bulldozed by the frustrations of the year spent spinning wheels with little results or change…
Change-
The topic of philosophers throughout time-
Can people really change?
My friend from Spain used to say this little saying all the time in Spanish- translated to English it states-
“You can put a monkey in silk but it is still a monkey.”
A tiger can’t change its stripes…
It goes on and on-
Personally, I believe anyone can change anything-
I believe in the will of man and the power of the mind.
This morning I sat and reflected on the things in my life I can 100% say I have changed- no matter how insignificant-
Evidence that it is possible to change a behavior, belief, pattern or habit.
Even the smallest of changes-
Let’s see…
1. I have learned how to eat slow and be conscious- when I was a little girl the moment my plate was down I inhaled it like I was born in a third world country and it was my last meal. My parents tried everything to convince me to eat more slowly- from making up stories of what happens to little girl’s stomachs that eat too fast- to playing the feminine card of it is not very “lady like”. Now- I can still put it away in 2.2 seconds- but I have learned to slow down- enjoy- even though to some it may seem I am still a speed eater:)
2. I used to drink a large Dr. Pepper every day. When I owned my hair salon I used to go and get one before the start of the work day every morning- It has now been seven years since I have had a soft drink- Once in awhile I will take a sip of sprite or 7 up~ I could have killed someone while I was going through my withdrawals, but I stuck with it anyway.
3. I took responsibility for my life- in my twenties my emotions controlled me- because I feel so deeply and am so sensitive- I was unstable, emotional, easily affected, possessive and reactive- these things I openly accept and do not deny. I was not this way all the time- but when hurt or in fear of being hurt I was a powder keg- Hot headed? Yes- Controlling? Yes. Insecure? Hell yes. I had been through a lot- trying to find my footing while carrying around so much baggage that it was impossible to ever be in balance. I have changed- this I can say and has it been easy? No way. It has been the hardest transformation in my 34 years. But when you get down to the heart of the matter- not afraid to look yourself in the mirror and admit that in imperfection lies the perfection- when you take responsibility and stop placing the power in other people’s hands through blame and projection- Any and I do mean ANY transformation is possible.
4. I used to judge other people- I made assumptions- spoke about people without ever considering what I was putting out into the world or how that may affect that person- I was never malicious- but I wasn’t conscious of the power of my words either. My feelings were so easily hurt and I was like a trash can for other peoples dirt- As my good friend “Crown Cherry “ says- I was like a vacuum that kept sucking up other peoples dirt- but I kept forgetting to change the bag:) Today? To judge someone feels like the most unnatural act to me- even someone who has really, really hurt me. I still find it difficult to stay in that place.
The reason I believe CHANGE is an absolute possibility in the human condition is because I do believe that we are innately good and these habits, fears and beliefs that taint our best are just like coats- when you are ready, when you see them in truth for what they are- you just take them off.
That simple-
My imperfections? Weaknesses? Things that people want to make me ugly with, because that is what we do to each other when we are still in fear- these things do not define me.
That is why, when I hear a lie that someone has spread- a false judgment that someone has spoken without being conscious of how that might hurt or affect a reputation-
These things sting at first- until I sit back and I can let it go- like a duck:) Just water off my back…
That is why I find it hard to judge another person-
We are all doing the best we can with where we are at. That is the beauty of evolution-
We can look back, even if it was two weeks ago and say, “What the hell was I thinking?”
And if we are even asking that question, then we are at a different place than we were when we made the choice we are questioning-
Nietzsche’s “Will to Power” – we are all, every one of us trying to cast our will upon another. Whether through the veil of love or the iron fist of one who cares less about shattering a person in pieces in order to protect an ego or pride.
So if every person comes from this place and this infiltrates every motive behind every action-
It is not magic once you know the trick-
The bullies, the people who hurt with intent, the ones who use their will to power?
They become like the wizard in the Wizard of Oz- behind the curtain of their “power” and viciousness there is a little fearful person-
All smoke and mirrors-
So I choose to love the little wizard in myself and every other person- the one who puffs up and asserts the Will to power…
This New Years do you believe change is possible?
What is it in you that could change? No matter how small…
