Hello, my name is Tweener…have we met?
Last night it hit me-
In the midst of painting my nails and doing my hair-
As I sat in my cozy, little condo apartment…
I was blankly staring into the refrigerator trying to come up with one little opinion or desire as to what might sound good for dinner-
And that is when it hit me. I have become aTweener-
You won’t find Tweener with google- at least not in the way I mean it.
A Tweener is a single who is in “between”-
Still young enough to be considered a “trophy” to the older generation and getting close to old enough to be eligible for the “cougar” category for the younger generation.
I moved on to the cabinets- blankly staring- recollecting the day’s events.
Earlier in the day I had been writing- at Starbucks- when this kid,
(You know you are getting old when you refer to a college student as “a kid”),
Anyway, this guy kept looking at me- I finally looked up and he gave this sexy, little smile.
I didn’t know what to do- I think I blushed- for the first time in a long time. Not so much at his good looks or blatant confidence in flirting- but at the fact that I would lay down money that he wasn’t even of drinking age yet-
I fixed my eyes on my computer screen trying not to notice that he would not take his eyes off of me.
Finally he asks me a question- I had to take my headphones off so I could hear him-
“So, do you wear those headphones to keep guys like me from talking to you?”- He asks.
“No, I am actually listening to music…”- I respond- trying to sound professional or maybe motherly-
Anything but flirtatious.
He sat staring-
“I see you in here a lot- always working hard- what are you working on?” he asks.
“I am working on editing a book and material for my website … so I am writing.” – I reply.
“Do you want to take a break and have lunch with me?”- he asks.
OK- I have to stop this now, I thought to myself.
Before I feel like I need to go to confession… and I am not even Catholic.
“How old are you?”- I ask him.
“How old do you think I am?”- He responds with a smile.
“Young enough to answer a question with a question.”- I reply dryly.
That got a smile out of him.
“I’m 19”- He says…” Why, is that an issue?”
I started laughing…as I replied, “ Uh, yeah… about a 16 year issue.”
He didn’t flinch…
“Look, you are very cute and seem to be a very nice guy, but I need to get back to writing and you need to get to someone from your decade.”- – I replied as I put my headphones back on.
He smiled and gave a little nod- got up and left.
So- last night as I sat and picked a bag of popcorn out of the pantry-
That is when it all became clear to me-
I am a tweener single.
I can’t remember the last time a man my age actually approached me-
Fifty somethings- yes!
Forty somethings- yes!
19 year olds- yes!
Twenty somethings? Yes!
Hell, I have even had 70 somethings hit on me…
But a man- my age? a few…
I am lost- floating somewhere in between the older, mature man who wants a younger, mature woman-
And college kids who think I am borderline Cougar material…
I put my popcorn in the microwave and put a movie in…
Foreign…
I have been watching so many movies with subtitles lately that I was half way through an American one last time before I realized I had subtitles on…
I sat in my bed- freshly painted nails- eating popcorn for dinner-
When I realized…
I needed intervention-
I called my best friend in Florida-
“Hi my love”- she answered with her usually cheery, yet kinda groggy voice.
“Am I calling too late?”- I asked her since she is one hour later.
“No, I was kind of asleep… but not really.”- She replied.
I kept it short-
“Love, if in the next year I get a cat- I want you to shoot me.” I said to her…
There! To the point.
She laughed out loud…I sat silent.
“Is that it?” – She asked, still laughing.
“Yep, that’s it. Go back to sleep…”
I hung up the phone and felt a little better.
I may not be able to change the tweener stage I am in right now.
But I can bring in the big guns to keep from going full out -stereotypical SINGLE!
Tags: cougar, dating, foreign movies, love, men, popcorn, relationships, tweener, women
Oh Amy, thank you for that! Not that I am laughing at your “predicament” rather I am amused at how you face it with your willingness to be naked in front of the world, to be honest and downright core truthful all at once.
Is it about the age specific range or about compatibility, spark, joy, polarity, passion, depth of intimacy and conversation? I know many women who found men their own age way too young for them, and some the other way around.
Maybe you want to head west for the winter and find depth and quality in the opposite sex?!!
Thank you again for being you and expressing your heart.
B.
Amy V,
OMG, so here’s the treat of reading you; The moment there is a hint that some “AV Inspiration” from that brainy heart of yours, is a click away, the grins begin!
Great story!!!
Older then a kitten yet younger then a cougar now has an official word for it: Tweener. This is too cool. We can now add this to the definition of this word in the dictionary, and it’ll have your picture on it as an example.
So does that mean there are moments in time where shifts in power project people into new worlds? If there are, I’d say this is one of them… a history making moment. Keep being you to have people learn to become who they should be.
Barry-
Well…I had a good guy friend email me after reading this and his conclusion was this… I intimidate the hell out of guys my age…
Which makes sense… I think, that older men have experienced enough women to appreciate a woman like me- assertive, truthful, none game playing, in touch with my intuition and not scared to believe in it or act on it…I think older men know that a woman like that is not afraid to bare it all when “the lights go down” both with soul and in the bedroom:) Older men understand that being in touch with yourself on that level makes a good lover and a good partner…
Now the younger guys see that “inner truthfulness” as slightly aggressive. Which turns them on for different reasons than the older men…or maybe the same on some levels.
But guys my age want it easy- they will settle for less passion in a relationship if that means they are not challenged to change or grow or think outside of their box a little. If it means less confrontation…or not having to be genuine in themselves. If it means they can comfortably stay in the middle of it all with out having to assert too much of themsleves in the area of inner truth or integrity to what they truly want and desire…
Thus- this makes me a Tweener:)
David-
Thank you so much! That made me happy to read:)
Sam- WOW~ if only that were true:)Think it would be pretty cool to create a new trendy word~:);)
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Like many of us in our 30’s – I’m starting to realize that the years are passing me by and as I’ve focus on my career, my friends, myself, my travels etc…